There’s nothing like waking up to find that the Church of England thinks your desired marriage to your beloved partner of 22 years would bring about the disestablishment of the Church of England.
The BBC link.
The Telegraph link.
The Guardian link.
In actual tears that such ignorance and bigotry provokes, I have to wonder what the Church of England does want from us?
To support its place as the church of state but not to question that place.
To forget how it became the church of state (Henry VIII’s divorce anyone?).
To keep paying our taxes that support its (and other faith) schools, but not to request that those faiths are tolerant of our diversity.
To applaud it for finally ‘allowing’ women priests, but not to support those women priests who would want to become bishops – despite the high-‘ranking’ women in early church history, despite the desire of many women (and men) for this, despite the simple equality such a change for women priests would indicate.
To allow the odd mix that has the monarch of our state to also hold the position as the head of its church.
To allow its bishops into our House of Lords to make laws that govern us all.
To allow its high-ranking members to make pronouncements as to the good (or otherwise) of pretty much everything from education to health to what we ought to be reading.
I did not vote for anyone in the Church of England, its place as the established church however, allows it to make the pronouncements it has today and for those pronouncements to carry legal weight.
In a month at Gladstone’s Library I had the pleasure of meeting several generous, thinking, aware, kind and seriously faithful members of CofE clergy. One of them, a priest for many many years, asked me “how can I support gay marriage without losing my job?” – I KNOW this view promoted today is not the view of all CofE clergy, or all CofE faithful. It might be time for those people to speak a little louder. There IS dialogue to be had here and I very much want it, not least because I am desperately tired of the hurt of living with an inequality forced on me by others and of feeling slapped down at every hopeful turn.
Not Writing But Blogging 
I’m a member of the Church of England, and I am heartbroken too. Not for an instant do I believe that this fulfils scripture, upholds the institution of marriage or protects the church. I believe Jesus would have welcomed all who came to his church in love and wanted to marry. As a church born out the desire of a selfish king to divorce his barren wife, they don’t have a strong position from which to throw the first stone. So sorry.
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thank you Rosie.
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Another member of the Church of England here to let you know this homophobic, biphobic and transphobic rubbish has nothing to do with Jesus’ teaching or the common belief of C of E members in general. I do some work with Changing Attitude (worth looking into) and I know many people think the C of E leadership has lost it on this one.
You would be very welcomed by my church (St Martin in the Fields, Trafalgar Square) and by many Anglicans I know.
Best, Rebecca
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thank you Rebecca.
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Stella: I went to a Mediaeval chivalric blood-brother ceremony at Croydon Parish church a couple of years ago. With incense. Don’t you think such a tailor-made rite would be more appropriate (and much camper) than an ordinary marriage? Let me appeal to your Byzantine sensibilities!
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Oh dear that is so awful. I am a member of a very small church that meets in the multi faith prayer space near the O2. We recently got together as a group and wrote a response on gay marriage which we all supported – certainly my priest totally supports equal marriage for all and his personal belief is that Jesus supported life partnerships and that marriage is a celebration also he always feels that a lot of Christians read too much into some parts of the bible which is after an historical document that can be misinterpreted. So like you I feel very disappointed in the church of England
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You said it perfectly Stella, Rosie, Rebecca and Sardav. We’ve tweeted and put it on our facebook page too (@gaydarradio gaydarradioofficial). As a gay Christian myself, the bigots who say gay marriage is “one of the most serious threats to Church in 500 years” – dear me. These “Christians” do not speak for me. Went to a gay accepting Church (Hillsong) recently and it was packed. Heaving. Went to a C of E Church in Sussex a few weeks ago, you could count the congregation on one hand (including vicar). In the words of that banner at St Paul’s Cathedral not so long ago … “What would Jesus do” I think we know…x
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Stella
Thank you fo the post, and to those commenters reminding me that despite its claims the CofE does *not* represent all Christians on this. The problem is that until moderate and rational Christians speak up, it is easy to assume that the bishops speak for all. Those in the church who want the power without the responsibility, to speak for Christians but not answer to them, to make rules for those who do not share their faith, are harming their own cause. I’m an atheist but I’d have no problem with a church making rules for themselves. Odd as it was to hear the Bishop of Leicester this morning arguing against gay marriage because it would mean extending the same human rights to gay couples as to straight ones. As it is, I can think of no faster route to disestablishment.
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It is terrible for a priest to be afraid to speak his mind about his support for equal marriage for fear of loosing his job! What sort of church is the CofE if this is true? I think it is time, at least, for this to become a conscience matter as the remarriage of divorcees was for quite some time (and still is to an extent), Those who support equal marriage should at least be able to bless CPs and support, in due course of time if the law changes as it should, those same-sex couples who seek God’s blessing on their love. Let’s not forget that this is about gay and lesbian people who, despite all the bigotry, prejudice and nonsense, have kept their faith and want their church to affirm their love. Andrew
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I’m upset too and I’ve ben a CofE (lay) reader for nearly 35 years. I don’t know how it can issue a statement which only reflects the worries of a certian part of the hierarchy. Not to mention the lie that bishops supported the civil partnership legislation – I hope that the Anglican church will be dragged into the real world but, today, I’m not holding my breath!
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thank you all for your support.
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This overly institutionalised church should be ashamed of itself. Many of its more enlightened members already are but don’t perceive that they can alter it from within. Time for another healthy schism – and (if necessary) another, and another, until the entrenched rump finally sinks under its own self-satisfied weight.
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Reblogged this on flyingontherainbow.
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Exactly.
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Thanks for your words on this issue Stella. I’ve shared it with our queer spiritual network on our Facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/lovespirit.gathering/posts/247227535386699?notif_t=like
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Respond vigorously to the official consultation – link cited in http://themostcake.co.uk/right-on/uk-gay-marriage-laws-only-two-days-left-to-have-your-say/ – and stuff the Church’s restrictive practices and discriminatory preaching in the process.
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It’s very helpful to know that many people are not taken in by this shameful attempt to enforce a party line which distorts the only message that matters: ‘God is love, and those that live in love live in God, and God lives in them.’
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Yes. Thank you.
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